Christmas 2019

To Our Village,


Tonight, as I finally sit at 10:29pm, I want to take the time to reflect, thank and apologise.

I have always said that I was not the right person to give a child like Amelia to.

I WILL ALWAYS feel that way.

I am totally the wrong person.


I am EXTREMELY emotional, think too much, talk WAY too much and am too protective over those that I love..........that I do everything mentioned previously ON REPEAT.


Sometimes I feel like I have won tattslotto with what has happened in the last 9 years.

Mostly I don't.

It has all changed me for the better INTERNALLY...

But changed me for the worst EXTERNALLY.


I have been gifted a tolerant (many will high five that one!), caring, supportive and independent individual in his own right = HUSBAND.

I have been gifted a defiant, sport mad, intelligent, kind, BIG personality, thoughtful and argumentative = SON.


I have also been gifted a  = DAUGHTER  who speaks way beyond her years and expected thinking for someone born in 2003.

She teaches others what can never be taught in schools or books.

She makes others FEEL love that blindsides you.

She teaches you personal growth you never knew possible.



And then they are stuck with ME!

I am not looking for sympathy or positive comments, so don't bother.



I just want to thank OUR VILLAGE tonight.


Whether you dislike one or all of us, you are on this page for a reason.



Maybe it is gossip or curiosity.


Maybe it is genuine admiration and/or love.



(After 9 years since diagnosis, you recognise friendship, gossip-mongers and people offended easily more closely.

It is like a microscope with my emotions and level of thinking!).



As we complete 2019, I thank anyone that made Scott, Tommy or Amelia smile and feel genuine happiness.


Thank you for creating, continuing or trying to establish friendship, support and genuine love with any of them.


As always, we have had our struggles this year.......

BUT so has anyone and everyone.


It is what they call, LIFE.


Scott has a small network around him that he adores.


Tommy has one that is constantly dissolving and growing with his young age.

People that he can turn to at anytime.



Tommy has just returned home from one of his "other families", in another Australian state and the happiness and love is flowing off  him.

I have considered their son one of my own since 2014.
I adore him.

I would not hesitate to have him living with us, I adore him that much!



And Amelia has had her carers, OR best friends as she prefers to call them.

They do their hours.

They spend time with her.

They establish "their connection and time with her".

Then they start to stay longer and then they message her frequently.

Then they have her stay overnight at their place free.........

Then they become family and I grow too close...........

I become protective and learn to love them too.

Professional relationship lost.



Scott has taught Amelia how to message through "voice command".

I have no idea what is going on with her messages anymore!
I do not know what messages she is sending!

Just like Tom!

Welcome to teenage hood.



We have amazing people come 4 times a week, into our home, to spend time with Amelia.

No matter what is occurring here or what mood any of us are in (predominately ME as I am the one here constantly).............

I am the only one that cannot lock myself away in a room away from our beautiful helpers...

I treat them too closely.

I know no other way, when they come into my home and act like they live here regularly.

They are people who genuinely love MY Amelia.

They become family.

THANK YOU to our amazing carers......


BUT now thank you to EVERYONE ON HERE.


Thank you to Amelia's Village.


OUR VILLAGE.


Tommy also has a massive one.


Thank you for your love support and hopefully personal growth through my writing.


Merry Christmas 2019.

xxx